...of course you are, darling. And I have been a professional bear-strangler for 75 years. I know, it doesn't sound that impressive, but when you take into account that I do it with my c0ck... And then of course during the summer I work as a Navy SEAL, for fun. Honest. I've got Bin Laudins left nut in a jar on my bookshelf. Stop by I'll let you feel it. Then we can go out in my mansions' backyard, and fire my GE mini guns at passing airplanes. It's a blast! Don't worry, we won't get in trouble if they crash because my brother happens to be the president...
Laugh all you want, I care not. If you're some low-life slacker I'm cool with that.